What’s the point in pretending? The first step towards healing and freedom begins with awareness and a simple admission: I am a caffeine addict.

You can do it too… just take a deep breath and close your eyes before saying it… (that way you won’t go pointing fingers at yourself whilst shouting ‘Ah ha! I knew it all along!’)

Go ahead, your turn…

Wow, did that feel as good as a cup of Hog Branch Breakfast Brew or what?

Okay, for those of you still in denial, there’s a glimmer of hope. You see, out yonder on the wild and wooly World Wide Web, there are folks who care enough to offer a form of ‘shock treatment’ that doesn’t have to include America’s favorite drug…

  The website is aptly titled, “Energy Fiend” which may or may not be a direct descendent from the 1930’s social stigma, “Dope Fiend”. Anyway, what you do is to click on the bluish ‘Energy Fiend’ link we just included a few lines above and first go to see the amount of caffeine it would take, per body weight, to punch your mortality ticket at the “Death by Caffeine” page.

Oh… and especially for the ladies, there’s also “Death by Penguin Mints”. Here you can find the lethal dosage of a lot of over-the-counter energy bars and of course, chocolates.

On other pages at this site, you’ll find lists of your favorite foods (et al) and the amount of caffeine in them. You might be surprised how much of this stuff the makers pack into everyday items.

On a final note though… and we did not intend the pun… in addition to being informative, it serves as a direct avenue to caffeinated self-destruction as many of the items listed have links to ‘Buy’ them. So if along your way to self-discovery you decide that you really have no intention of reforming, you can exit with your shopping cart full of zot.

Man, that’s just too sweet…

Well, time for us to wrap this one up… see yall over at Maxwell’s House.

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